Saturday, February 27, 2010

The Upper MUNY Parking Lot

I try to live my life in a way that when someone comes up to me and says, "I've got this go-kart, do you know anyplace we can use it?" The answer is yes.

For basic go-karting, donut spinning, motorcycle learning, stick shift practice and general parking lot sessioning I recommend the Upper MUNY Parking lot. It's close, huge and rarely used as a place to park cars. A perfect place to ride and drive things of questionable legality.

The thing that makes a parking lot good for motorsporting practice is size. The Upper MUNY is a big parking lot. The surface is not perfect. But it offers plenty of room to dabble with chaos.

By car, the approach is winding. Adult trees conceal the lots' true size until the next to last moment. At the moment of reveal, she is stunning. Long enough to blur the edges on a sweltering August afternoon. Long enough to use as a quarter mile drag strip for slow vehicles with small wheels.

At the Upper MUNY you feel atop a plateau, vistas to various styles reveal themselves at the cardinal directions. A moat of mature oaks and turf grass immediately below. It was surreptitiously designed by some unknown genius of the drug-soaked 1970's civil engineering underground as a playing field for things with wheels and motors. Two of the best three things.


The Upper MUNY Parking Lot


Reverse Angle


People Know

I'm not letting you in on some great secret. Ask around. People know the upper MUNY is a dialed spot. Those beer bottles didn't empty and break themselves. That Spiro-graph of cauterized rubber isn't from parked cars. This lot has seen the business end of fat meats. J's were done, and the fuzz knows it.

Relax man, the cops have other stuff to worry about. Not gonna waste their time on five beer-spitting low lifes racing a go-cart in an empty parking lot. They're gonna be happy we're not giving each other blow jobs in the woods, or shooting rich white ladies.

Since this whole thing was conceived as a guide to St. Louis, let me fill you in on some the details. The Upper MUNY is one of two parking lots for the Municipal Theater in Forrest park. For those of you not familiar with St. Louis, the Municipal Theater, or MUNY, is where old people go on summer nights to sit. Their Cadillacs and Buicks wait patiently in the lot. Anticipating the return trip west.


The MUNY

Once a year, after 40 days of penance, the Upper Muny Parking Lot gets its moment to shine.

The Easter Car Show is a St. Louis tradition. Held Easter Sunday on the Upper MUNY parking lot it's the place to see interesting cars and St. Louis' car people. Originally organized by the old rich guys with British roadsters and shiny Model A sedans, The Easter Car Show now belongs to St. Louis. We took it over by driving hose clamped together Donks and Hyundai Tiburons with $5000 stereos and $50 airbrush murals, and parking them proudly next to whatever trailer queen the banker in the Hawaiian shirt brought.

Do yourself a favor and go to the Easter Car Show this year. Don't sweat seeing the Concourse D'Elegance, the real show is what the spectators bring. Two years ago Cole and I watched a fire breathing pro-street Camaro get loose right into the lower MUNY's stone retaining wall.


The Lower MUNY Parking Lot

The man with the Camaro made one critical mistake. He chose the wrong parking lot. The Upper MUNY is the lot for getting loose in $50,000 street legalish race cars. The Lower MUNY is for getting romantic with some guy you just met behind Steinburg Ice Rink.

11 comments:

Pancake Master said...

If I ever hear a policeman say the words "You're under arrest for giving blowjobs in the woods," I will probably die laughing, but at least I will die happy.

Maureen Grady said...

i dont think you can ever know how happy these posts make me.
thank you.
i hope they dont ever stop....

John P. said...

I was witness to the hoon in the camaro. I believe we rode mopeds that year. We bent his wheelie bar good

John P. said...

Also, Andy B. taught me how to do reverse 180 to hand brake turns in this parking lot.

tony said...

i know this lot.

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness! Awesome article dude! Thanks, However I am having
difficulties with your RSS. I don't understand the reason why I can't subscribe to it.
Is there anybody else having the same RSS issues?
Anyone that knows the answer can you kindly respond? Thanks!
!
Look at my homepage ... Mitoslim

Anonymous said...

Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I certainly enjoyed reading it, you could be a great author.

I will always bookmark your blog and will come back in the future.
I want to encourage continue your great writing, have a nice day!
Also visit my web page ... Green Coffee Diet

Anonymous said...

Good day! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a team of volunteers and starting a
new initiative in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us useful information to work on.
You have done a extraordinary job!
My weblog ... Auravie

Paul Mendoza said...

Also, Andy B. taught me how to do reverse 180 to hand brake turns in this parking lot.

Anonymous said...

just dropping by to say hey

Anonymous said...

Attractive part of content. I simply stumbled upon your
website and in accession capital to say that I acquire in fact
enjoyed account your weblog posts. Any way I'll be subscribing to your augment and even I success you get right of entry to persistently fast.
See this: kliknij, http://whimpering.waw.pl